A full transcript of this episode is available by clicking here.
In her new book, Insights from a Prophet’s Life, Sheri Dew writes that one night years ago, she awoke suddenly, sat straight up in bed, and had one of the clearest impressions of her life, "Russell M. Nelson is going to be the president of the Church." Looking back, Sheri writes that "because of that nighttime message, I had a witness long before President Monson died. Not only that Russell M. Nelson was a prophet, seer, and revelator but that he would become the senior apostle and thus president of the Church." It has become even clearer, while writing a book about his life, she says, that "the Lord has had him in His tutelage from day one." On this week’s episode of All In, Sheri Dew discusses what she has learned about prophets from writing biographies of Presidents Ezra Taft Benson, Gordon B. Hinckley, and Russell M. Nelson.
While sharing one of her favorite stories from President Nelson’s life, Sheri expounded on an interesting observation about President Nelson’s life: His respect for women, specifically his first wife, Dantzel, who passed away in February 2005 and Sister Wendy Watson Nelson, whom he married in April 2006.
Read an excerpt of the interview below or listen to the entire interview here.
Morgan Jones: Do you, Sheri, have a favorite story or a story that provides insight into a unique aspect of President Nelson's life in the book?
Sheri Dew: I mean, if something was included in this particular book—which is a collection of major episodes in his life—if it's in there, I included it because for me it was insightful. That's the subjective nature of the book is to say, when we say Insights from a Prophet's Life, well somebody had to select things and say, "Oh, I think that's insightful. That's insightful." And so if it's in there, then for me it was meaningful in some regard. But it's interesting to me how he handled everything . . . I loved learning more about his first wife, Dantzel, who passed away in 2005 and her enormous influence on him. One of the stories I do truly love is the story of him operating on a couple of little girls in a certain family, and one little girl had died of . . . more than a congestive heart situation, she had, I think a malformed heart. And then her little sister, a year or so later, the parents pleaded with him to operate on this little girl, and she too had serious problems, and he couldn't save either one of them. And this was still kind of in the early days of heart surgery where they were learning.
I asked him one day, "Today, would surgeons be able to save those girls?" and he said, "Probably one of them, but probably not the other." Two little girls had died on his operating table, and he comes home and he's just distraught and he's weeping, and pretty much through the night. And Dantzel stays with him and he's bemoaning, "I can't do this to another family. I just can't take this, I can't do this anymore." And so she stays with him all night as he is just beside himself and weeping much of the night and so forth. And when dawn comes, she says to him basically, "Well, are you done crying yet? Go back to the lab. Get dressed and go back to the lab. Because if you stop now, somebody else will have to spend the time to get to where you are. And you just need to get better, you need to learn more, you need to learn more procedures and don't have lives lost because somebody else is trying to catch up to where you already are.
I have a friend who's spent a lot of time as a marriage and family therapist who says that you can tell the best marriages when a husband is willing to be influenced by his wife. And here [President Nelson] is, already a pretty famous heart surgeon, willing to be influenced by his wife, who kind of said, "Are you done crying yet? Go back to the lab." And I love that story because I think there are just layers of meaning in it.
MJ: That's one theme that I saw in the book, is that over and over again, we kind of see his respect and his love and admiration for women, whether it was Dantzel or Sister Nelson. And I think that is such a powerful principle and something that's so valuable for our Church right now. I think there are so many women in particular that want to feel respected, and I think we see how President Nelson is a respecter of women. How have you seen that—especially being such a good friend of Sister Nelson—how have you seen his respect for women?
SD: I mean, I think it speaks for itself. Again, I certainly had met Sister Dantzel Nelson, but I didn't know her well. I remember going to her funeral. And in fact, I remember calling Wendy—Wendy Nelson, then Wendy Watson—I remember calling Wendy afterwards and said, "Boy, she must be a remarkable woman because just from sitting through the funeral, you just knew this is a dynamic and a strong and a wise and a loving woman."
And then I do know Sister Wendy Nelson very, very well. And I think she speaks for herself. When you listen to her speak, when you just hear her intellect to her ability to express her testimony, but also she's very skilled as a marriage and family therapist, very skilled in her own right, had a very important career before she married then-Elder Nelson.
I think what you see is that he married two very dynamic women, so that's probably enough said on that. Now, I do know his daughters, and his daughters are just great. And I know so many of his granddaughters. And I think he has profound respect and absolutely knows how vital women are to making just about everything go, and I think you see it over and over again. But the best way you see it is looking at the two women he chose to marry. They're both amazing in their own rights.
MJ: I love that. I had never heard until reading this book the story of Dantzel's passing, and I loved his prompting that he received right after her passing where he said that the Lord referred to him as "My boy." And I think that that shows his relationship with God, that God communicates with him and that they are so tightly knit that He would refer to him in that way.
Listen to the whole interview here. You can also read a full transcript here.