As a mother, I was grateful for the mentors who stepped in as additional role models for my teenagers. We have a very supportive family, but these mentors provided needed encouragement and confidence. Mentors also created a powerful network my children could rely on to strengthen them to face difficult situations and to stay strong in their faith.
Based on my academic research about mentoring and my personal experiences, here are three ways we can be mentors to the youth in our lives.1
1. Take the Crucial First Step
This may sound simple, but choosing to be a mentor is a crucial first step. In fact, research shows that a mentor’s commitment to mentoring can be more important than specific skills.2
Hold to that. Becoming an effective mentor may take time and practice, and we can expect to make some mistakes along the way, but it is important that you have confidence that you can learn to be a successful mentor.
Many helpful books, articles, and free courses are available online to guide us. We can also look at the examples of great mentors we know, mentors in the scriptures, and Church leaders as mentors. Choose to pay attention to specific ways they have mentored as examples for your own mentoring efforts.
2. Focus on These Two Things
Research shows there are two things we should focus on when we are with someone we hope to mentor:
- Helping them feel “respected as an individual”3
- “Providing empathy for … concerns and [feelings]”
Focusing on those two things will help build trust, which is key for establishing the mentoring relationship.4
To create this mentoring trust with youth, we choose to get to know them. We let youth know by our active presence in their lives that they are important to us.
As appropriate, we may visit youth in their homes to get to know them. We can attend their extracurricular events and cheer them on. We may mentor youth by giving them an opportunity to work for or with us and provide encouragement for them in their efforts. We mentor youth by showing them they matter to us as individuals.
3. Implement this Role Model Best Practice5
Recognize that you are a role model for the youth in your life. This doesn’t mean you need to be perfect; it means you are doing your best to live as a disciple of Jesus Christ.
One best practice for being a role model is to share your life experiences, as appropriate. Be willing to share how you’ve overcome challenges and faced difficulties in your lives. Seeing our example of resilience in school, faith, family situations, or life circumstances can give them encouragement not to quit when they face their own challenges.6
The Savior is our ideal example of mentoring. Throughout the scriptures, we see Him mentor His disciples as He helped them become who He and our Heavenly Father knew they could become.
Whether in church callings or congregations, in our families, through volunteering, or in other opportunities, there are many impactful ways to mentor youth.
As we give our best efforts to mentor the youth in our lives, we can show them the example of our Savior, Jesus Christ, as we guide them in becoming the women and men God wants them to be.
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Notes
1. While this research references higher education, the mentoring principles can be similarly applied to youth mentoring.
2. Kramer-Simpson, E. (2018). Moving from student to professional: Industry mentors and academic internship coordinators supporting intern learning in the workplace. Journal of Technical Writing and Communication, 48(1), 81–103. doi: 10.1177/0047281616646753
3. Castellanos, J., Gloria, A. M., Besson, D., & Harvey, L. O. C. (2016). Mentoring matters: Racial ethnic minority undergraduates’ cultural fit, mentorship, and college and life satisfaction. Journal of College Reading and Learning, 46(2), 81–98. doi: 10.1080/10790195.2015.1121792, p. 93.
4. Bear, S., & Jones, G. (2017). Students as protégés: Factors that lead to success. Journal of Management Education, 41(1), 146–168. doi: 10.1177/1052562916658688
5. Andersen, C. L., & West, R. E. (2020). Improving mentoring in higher education in undergraduate education and exploring implications for online learning. Revista de Educación a Distancia (RED), 20(64).
6. Andersen, C. L., & West, R. E. (2021). “We Overwhelm Them with Hope”: How Online Mentors Can Support Online Learners. Online Learning, 25(4), 388-415.
Free mentoring articles and resources are available from the author on her website: Mentoring123.com.
