Close X
Follow Us Get our Free Newsletter
LDSLiving Magazine
VIDEO Self Family Home Entertaining Travel Our World Lesson Helps Blogs
Topics: Blogs / Polls

{Poll} Breastfeeding in Public

Ashley Evanson - January 19, 2012

Thinkstock.

I'm a new mom, and yes, I nurse. But I have mixed feelings about doing it in public.

I am so grateful to be able to give my baby breast milk, and I love that it's healthy, easy, and free. But I'm not so sure about feeding her in public. I understand that it's not indecent exposure; it's a beautiful thing for a mother to feed her child. But I feel so awkward doing it, and I know people around me feel awkward, too.

I bring this up because we recently had a discussion in the LDS Living office about breastfeeding in public. There is a mother in someone's ward who breastfeeds during sacrament meeting. She is very considerate of others and covers herself, but everyone in the congregation can still hear it, and that bothers some people.

The Salt Lake Tribune ran an article a few months ago on a mother who was asked to nurse in a more private area while out shopping (she was not wearing a nursing cover). Long story short, she was in the right and other customers will have to accept it in the future. But is it wrong that I kind of feel bad for those other customers? I know it's not pornographic - I'm a nursing mother, I get it. But I also wouldn't want my husband or a teenage son to see another woman's breast. Is that wrong?

Your turn: What do you think? Am I totally crazy? Take our poll and leave a comment below.

How do you feel about women nursing in public?





If you nurse/have nursed, what's your style?






Are there any places you think are inappropriate for nursing?




© LDS Living 2012.
Tags: LDS Culture, Poll, Motherhood

You may also like:

Comments 92 comments

kenslew said...

12:41 PM
on Jan 18, 2012

Report Abuse

I also love the opportunity I have to nurse my baby. I would love to nurse in public, and it would never bother me (even if a woman wasn't covered), but I know it makes OTHER people uncomfortable - so I just avoid it altogether.<P> I just wish we lived in a place where breasts weren't such a big deal (I'd love to know if the attitudes are different in other countries). It really is too bad that a mother should feel uncomfortable about feeding her baby. It has nothing to do with being immodest, and everything to do with nurturing a child.<P> In the end, to each her own. I just wish those who would like to nurse at all times (like me) could do so without feeling they're doing something wrong.

emcclure said...

02:51 PM
on Jan 18, 2012

Report Abuse

Sometimes mothers have no choice but to nurse in public, but I think when possible, they should find a private place to nurse.

bobbruce said...

08:30 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

As long as there are men and boys, breasts will always be a "big deal".

tjsb said...

08:48 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I was very uncomfortable for my husband and children as a relative whipped out her breast to nurse. I know it is natural, but do we have to expose our children and teenagers even if covered? My husband talked about being a missionary and walking into the library and discovering it is a nursing visit room and sitting on the stand for Priesthood and having a woman sit at the back of the chapel and nursing. Sometimes we need to show more respect for our selves and others by keeping ourselves and the private time with our babies just that, private.

lacey said...

09:06 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I agree with emcclure. I have nursed in airport terminals and on airplanes, but I had no other option and kept covered with a blanket.. but when you're at church, the mothers lounge is much more appropriate, that is its purpose, and you won't miss the speaker because most buildings have intercom systems.

leecrites said...

09:11 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

1) Nursing is a completely natural thing to do, and it should be encouraged as much as possible and as widely as possible. 2) The lack of comfort for being around breastfeeding moms is directly connected to the attitude we give when we are around breastfeeding moms. I grew up outside of the U.S., where breast exposure isn't as "unnatural" as it is in our uptight, socially awkward country -- which at once exposes breasts any time it can for the glory of salesmanship and marketing, and then demeans those who do so naturally. 3) Frankly, if husband and sons or leadership dudes are emotionally distraught by a nursing mother, then that is a truly sad commentary on how we are raising our sons. 4) Breastfeeding does not equate to, say, peeing, which is another completely natural event. Social norms dictate we keep the removal of bodily waste private by going to the bathroom. If our society felt towards eating the way it feels towards public urination, then, yes, relegating nursing mothers to a private room would seem reasonable. But eating is a public, and very social event. If a breastfeeding mother is seen by some to be unacceptable in a public, social event, then the skewed attitude is not the mother's.

teahlayne said...

09:25 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

First of all, it's good to see that there are LDS mothers who nurse! In the St. Louis metropolitan area, it is rare to see nursing mothers at church. Frankly, I am more offended seeing a mother using bottles and pacifiers than seeing a mother breastfeeding. I agree that, at church, the mothers' lounge is the best place to nurse. I also agree that finding a more private place to nurse in public is better, more for the sake of privacy for the mother and child. Breastfeeding is a very intimate experience, and I used to love watching and caressing my son when he nursed. If I covered him up or was in a public place full of distractions, that took away the intimacy that I enjoyed, as well as both of us getting sweaty under the cover. On the other hand, I have no problem with women openly breastfeeding in public areas. It's not offensive, and it's really none of my business.

tiftifc said...

09:30 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I am a nursing mother and am very happy that other mothers chose to breast feed their babies. I also believe that we are a modest people. I don't feel comfortable when the mother sitting next to me is nursing a baby and her baby is pulling her cover out of the way and exposing the nursing mother. My children have always pulled a cover out of the way when nursing so I choose not to nurse in public for that exact reason. I feel that if you have a child that doesn't like to be covered when nursing then you should not nurse in public. I understand there are times when it my be a necessity but we should respect the modesty of others and find a more private place to nurse.

twocentsworth said...

09:36 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I am all for nursing babies,it's natural and healthy for the child and the mother,but I also feel to be considerate of others in the process,that is not a statement that nursing is bad.There are always two sides to every story. I have nursed two of my children,the third had health issues and a long stay in the hospital so nursing didn't work with that child. I personally am not comfortable viewing another woman's unclothed private body parts and yes our chest are included. I also do not appreciate another woman revealing herself to my sons or husband. Our minds are cameras and once we see something,the picture stays. I am not against nursing in public,what is the big deal about throwing a blanket over your shoulder? We are counseled to be modest in dress, we wear temple garments-so why should we not be thoughtful about and careful about unclothing ourselves in public? I have been around other women who I feel was doing this (nursing uncovered)for less than needful reasons and that's as much as I will say on that. I am sorry,but I do not want to see your private body parts and do not wish my spouse/sons to view you either. You are welcome to sit beside me and nurse and I support you in it,but please be respectful and cover yourself.

jackie said...

09:42 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I'm the mom of 9 (8 living), now a grandma too. When I totalled it up, I breastfed 12.5 years in all. (My sisters have had similar family sizes and similar lengths of being b'fdng moms).My experience differs in that my oldest and youngest had cleft palate and *couldn't* breastfeed naturally. I feel that first, we need to teach women (&their husbands & sons) the incredible health benefits of breastfeeding, for both baby and mom; THEN worry about the "cover or not" debate. That said, I know my husband would also cringe if he was conducting a Sac. mtg and saw a mom nursing her baby, covered or not, due to his own "socialization".

megtaylor said...

09:44 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I've nursed both my girls and support breast feeding. I'm rather modest and have tried using a cover in public (though baby #2 refused to cooperate, so I'd employ flowy tops to keep things covered, or find a more secluded place if there were many men around and my daughter wouldn't cooperate). I appreciate when others try and show understanding for discomfort while still being moms and fulfilling their role as they see fit. However, I would feel absolute rage when I'd use the bathroom at BYU and hear a mom trying desperately to nurse her baby in the next stall. NO mother should have to feed their child in a bathroom. We don't eat our lunches in there, after all!! I feel an honest effort to accommodate on both parts (nursing moms and the public) should suffice, and then a healthy dose of tolerance when conditions aren't so accommodating. I would far rather see a mom nurse in public with or without a cover than see her do it in a bathroom.

jackie said...

09:45 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

@Kenslew - yes, in other countries it has been much more acceptable to nurse in public - according to my research; but seeing as that's over a decade old now, that may have changed...It has also been much more acceptable in other time periods. In the Cardston, Canada temple, dedicated in 1923, the original murals showed nursing moms with flesh uncovered, sitting on the ground & listening to the Savior. In the early '90's reno's, the flesh was painted over.

jackie said...

09:50 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

To clarify: *flesh* meaning the mother's exposed breast - but only the slight part that was visible on one side while the mother held the baby in nursing position against her own chest. I feel the "pornographizing" of breastfeeding just helps Satan keep women down - they & their children won't be as healthy as God intends them to be - Heavenly Father's the ultimate Creator of this baby feeding system of course!

lillian said...

10:06 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I nursed all three of my children and I did nurse them in public. The number one thing we need to do when we are nursing in public is to be considerate of others. At your home you can do whatever you want. Cover yourself in public. Don't expose yourself to everyone around you and make them uncomfortable. That's just not right. Even though you are nursing, you shouldn't be exposing your breasts. If you are in a public place try to find somewhere more private, an out-of-the-way if possible. A lot of places (malls, etc.) will have a mother's lounge. When I had extended family at my home that I knew would feel embarrased by my nursing, I would go into another room. I know someone who nurses in Sacrament Meeting, but she covers herself and her baby isn't a noisy nurser. If her baby was a noisy, it wouldn't be appropriate as it would make others uncomfortable. Yes, we definitely have a right to nurse when and where we chose, but that doesn't mean that we can't take steps to make others around us comfortable. It's a balance.

lbsbeamom7 said...

10:08 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I breastfed my 7 children. At first I was so shy that I would only feed my 1st son in front of my husband and my mother. Eventually, I became adept at discreetly feeding my babies in a public place if necessary, though I would seek out a quiet, private place if possible. I think that choosing to feed your baby in any situation where it would make others uncomfortable, and where you would call direct attention to yourself and your breastfeeding baby should be avoided, if possible. There is no reason to make others feel uncomfortable if you don't have to do so. Even as a breastfeeding mother I take exception to the sight of a mother walking the isles of the grocery store with her child nursing on her completely uncovered breast. Not because I think there is anything wrong with the human body, but because it shows a complete disregard to the sensibilities of others. Breastfeeding is wonderful, and can be most enjoyed in a quiet, private and restful setting if possible.

momw said...

10:09 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I am a mom who personally prefers to Breast feed in private. I feel that there are alot of these outspoken breast feeding moms that seem to want to make that a crime. I prefer private personal time with my infant and when out and about I don't mind if I have to sneak into a restroom or the privacy of my car to Breast feed. I shouldn't be made to feel guilty about that. Quit saying that this is shameful or that there is something pornographic or sexual about it...it is just how I feel! Of course when a nursing lounge is available it is most appreciated!

wakeuphappy said...

10:18 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

While I wouldn't feel comfortable nursing in sacrament meeting, I have often wished I could feel comfortable nursing in Relief Society. I just hate leaving Relief Society lessons to sequester myself in a corner to do something that could easily be done discretely so I could participate in the lesson. As a mother who sits alone in sacrament meeting with six children (two of whom were born while my husband was bishop), I can completely understand how nursing in sacrament meeting could feel necessary... but instead, I just let my toddler toddle after us and join us in the mother's lounge. (She wouldn't have it any other way.) When my oldest was a newborn, I remember having a childless couple come to visit for an evening. My baby needed to eat. I hated pulling myself away to go back in our back bedroom and nurse, but I just wasn't sure how uncomfortable it would be for our friends if I nursed (covered) in their presence. By baby #2, I learned to "ask permission" and then roll with it. If the mother can get past the initial awkwardness, it usually passes quickly for everyone else.

enjoybirth said...

10:28 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I breastfed all my boys whenever and wherever they were hungry. I was discreet about it and I don't think I made others uncomfortable. I respect the fact that not all moms feel comfortable nursing and public and that is fine. But I think if more moms did it then it would be more acceptable and less of an issue. I have blogged about all the places I have nursed. http://enjoybirth.com/blog/2010/07/06/nip-ready-to-whip-it-out-if-needed/ I have 3 boys and they all know that breastfeeding is normal. In fact a few weeks ago my 13 yo and his friends saw a breastfeeding mom. They came up to me and my 13 yo told me, "Tell my friends it is OK to nurse in public." So we had a conversation about it with the boys. I said if they felt uncomfortable they could go somewhere else, but that it is normal and the woman (and baby) have legal rights to nurse wherever she wants. Some boys were still uncomfortable so they did go somewhere else. But I am glad that my son knows that it is a normal natural way to feed a baby and not something to be uncomfortable about. My husband served his mission in the Dominican Republic and would do baptismal interviews with women breastfeeding their baby with no kind of covering at all. It is truly just a normal daily occurrence there. He said at first it was strange, but after awhile it was no big deal. My husband was my biggest support when it came to breastfeeding whenever my boys were hungry. I am sure his experience on his mission helped.

mstmompj said...

10:33 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

Once you get past the newborn days of awkwardness, if one dresses appropriately (2-piece outfits, lift from the bottom of the shirt/blouse), no flesh shows, cover or no cover. Most people who are offended by nursing in public are offended by the IDEA of it, not by any sight of flesh or sound (breastfed babies are typically a lot more quiet that bottle fed babies), so hiding under a tent or blanket to nurse in public isn't going to help. Jesus's mother Mary and the pioneer women--all modest women--didn't ask permission to nurse or retreat to special rooms. If it's okay for a mother to be in the room and for a baby to be fed by bottle in a room, it is okay for me to breastfeed my baby in that room. Since I'm not showing a centimeter of flesh in doing so, perhaps anyone else who is offended should put a blanket over his or her head. And sadly, most of the people who get worked up about this are other WOMEN (to wit the comments in this thread).

lecriveur said...

10:33 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

This is a question that has no right answer. It is something that each mother has to decide for herself. My wife breastfed both of our children and when in public she was more comfortable covering up. When it comes to breasts, I see it as a matter of context. As an elder of Israel, I don't have a problem with it.

azmomof6 said...

10:37 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I nursed 6 children, who are now 15 to 28 yrs old. I was involved in La Leche League for most of that time, no matter where we lived (even in Tokyo, Japan). I have several comments and responses. We all agree that mother's milk is best for the child. Yet our society is so warped that breasts are OK for sex and advertising, but not for their original purpose (nurturing children) -- thanks to the Great and Abominable Church. (I'm reading 1st Nephi) The only way we as a society can return to God's design (for mothers to nurse their children) is if we bring nursing out of the closet and make it the CULTURAL NORM. When no one is bothered by the sight or the thought of a baby nursing, we will have succeeded in that change. My husband remembers that when he was growing up (in a small town in Utah) it was normal for women to nurse their babies in Sacrament meeting. So this change is relatively recent. My initiation in public nursing: When my first child was 1 week old I attended Church, and ended up in a large class (of mostly men) packed onto the stage for an important presentation (I had missed the main one the week before , and this was my make-up day). Of course we were still learning how to nurse, and the baby would need to nurse right then. I was not where I could get out without causing a major disruption, so had my husband help with a drape and I nursed her right there in class. No one complained, at least to me. I have always tried to be considerate of others by being careful to be discrete, but using a drape did NOT work for us -- like tiftifc, my babies would not leave it alone. So I learned some other tricks (thanks to LLL) to keep myself covered and still be able to nurse my baby: 1. loosen your clothes from the bottom, not the top. If you pull a shirt up, the worst that happens is that a little midriff shows, and that can be covered with a men's athletic T-shirt worn under the shirt. (the big armholes allow plenty of access) My favorite outfit was a button-up shirt over the athletic T -- it can be worn unbuttoned, or unbuttoned from the bottom when baby needs to nurse. (the shirt-tail gives a little extra coverage) megtaylor's idea of flowy tops is great. A jumper with low armholes also works very well. There are also specialty clothes available ready-made and patterns to make your own special nursing clothes. If I had the time I would have made a few, especially for Church. (My favorite source: http://www.elizabethlee.com/patterns/mompats.htm) 2. wrap the baby in a light blanket (or quilt if it's cold), with a little extra to cover the baby's face. Between your shirt and the blanket, there's very little exposure, yet the baby can breathe and you can see baby. If you need to, you can cover baby completely and signal to the overly curious "shhh," implying baby is sleeping, don't disturb. 3. a baby sling is very handy when baby needs to nurse while you are busy (shopping, for example). I use a fanny pack for a purse, and between that and a sling I was able to nurse while shopping quite easily -- in a button-up shirt! 4. the most discrete nursing bra can be opened and closed with one hand; fishing around to work the clasp is very obvious. This may take searching and practice. I preferred snaps above the cup, but they became hard to find. 5. there are age and stages, and some are less discrete than others. Brand-new babies are still learning to latch-on, so privacy is best. Older babies (past 6-9 months) start to be distracted by what's going on around them, so privacy helps then focus and get done. The "sweet spot" for mine was about 1 month to around 9 months. By then they could usually just wait until we got home, because they were also eating solid food and could have a snack to tide them over. A few references on making breastfeeding the cultural norm (warning: some sites have more discrete illustrations than others): http://www.llli.org/llleaderweb/lv/lvoctnov00p87.html http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=136659843057879 http://www.nursingfreedom.org/2010/07/carnip-day-1.html

lauriea said...

10:43 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

Really, this is getting out out hand! We sit together and eat, There is not reason that I because of nursing my daughter should have to leave any social event because I have to feed my baby. I am now a grandma. When I was a young mother, a very young mother I knew the benefit of feeding my child with the God given tools I was born with! I never left a room to feed my children in private.(unless they were very fussy and having a hard time settling to eat) If all was well, I covered myself and off they went enjoying the meal. I had people come up to me to se the baby not really knowing I was feeding her..ooops for them. I was ok with it though. I do not have any hangups with my/our bodies. I think they are designed well and functional. Our maker did a great job (Ok I have a little beef with joints, now that I am older) I brestfed as long as I could and my daughters wanted to. I thnk for the comfort of others, covering up is they way to go. If you want to let it all hang out then a private place should be the choice. Although if I cam across a breast-feeding mom out in the open it would not offend me. I really can't understand how if covered, in church or wherever, how it could offend anyone. One reader mentioned the noise bothered some. Really??? Babies make noise when they eat...bottle or breast! I say get over it people. There is just too much of a hangup with breasts. That is what they are for! The more it is done, the more it will be a normal part of life.

bjr said...

10:53 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

It's obvious to me, reading these comments, that the majority of the women posting here have no real understanding of how Hormones work. In short: Women & girls (thanks to Estrogen) are EMOTIONAL & VERBAL. Men & boys (thanks to Testosterone) are PHYSICAL & VISUAL. It's very natural and understandable that women feel comfortable about this issue. It's a HUGE emotional thing for them. But men aren't emotionally driven. When a man sees exposed breasts, it doesn't matter the reason (or how sweet and intimate and natural and comfortable and emotional breastfeeding is to the woman and baby). Bare breasts result in hormones being released in abundance. It's an internal, chemical reaction that males have absolutely NO control over. Yes, we're supposed to control how we REACT to those hormones, but we can't stop the hormones from doing their job. As long as women and girls are covered modestly (as described in all Church guidelines), our hormones will stay in check, for the most part. Women, get a clue. From a man's point of view, this has nothing to do with a baby being fed. Keep your body parts to yourself, please.

amberlou said...

11:02 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I nurse in public. I occasionally nurse in the presence of men. I also nurse in Sacrament meeting. I have 3 kids under age 5, and when my husband is at work on Sunday (which happens several times a month) carting all 3 kids to the "mother's lounge" is not a feasible option. Further, the "mother's lounge" in my ward building consists of a 5x7 room with 1 chair. There were 9 babies born in our ward in 2011. To say it gets a bit crowded would be an understatement. If you are uncomfortable with women discreetly nursing in public, keep your eyeballs to yourself, please.

cindys said...

11:09 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I think that anyplace that is appropriate to bring an infant is an appropriate place to nurse that infant. I think that women should cover themselves modestly while they nurse out of respect for others. I think the 'others' should get over any squeamishness they feel about the mere realization that an infant is feeding at his mother's breast. A final question? Which is more distracting? to have a mother discreetly feed her infant during a church meeting or to haul a screaming infant out of the meeting? An infant who is fed promptly is more likely to be calm and quiet during a church meeting.

catilina said...

11:14 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

It is for precisely some of the reason cited above as why women should not breastfeed uncovered that I think it is so crucial that women *do.* For our sons and our husbands (and for our daughters who someday will breastfeed their own babies), breastfeeding needs to become normal. For all you saying you don't want your sons to see a woman breastfeeding her baby (heaven forbid he actually learn to respect women's breasts and not view them as mere sexual objects), what happens when he is a missionary in Sweden, or Mexico, or Peru, and a woman breastfeeds her baby as he is teaching the first discussion? If he has grown up seeing women he knows and respects feeding their babies as God designed, he will be able to react respectfully when he encounters, as a teenager and grown man (as he will), women breastfeeding babies. He will not feel uncomfortable, awkward, turned on, aroused, etc, because it is normal. I am thrilled that my 5-year-old son knows that breasts are for feeding babies and that it is a completely normal, ordinary thing for him to see. I am thrilled that he will not need to gawk as a teenager when he sees his neighbor breastfeeding her baby. I am thrilled that when he is a husband he will be able to support his wife as she learns to breastfeed her own baby. This issue is purely cultural, and in my opinion the only way to deal with it is to make it a non-issue in our culture just as it is in many, many cultures already. Breastfeed your baby when she's hungry. And one other thing. To the man who said it's all about hormones. Tell that to my husband, who after 5 1/2 years of parenting breastfeeding babies and being friends with parents of breastfeeding babies, has seen more than his fair share of babies at breasts (and not just our own babies at my breast). It is no more a turn-on for him to see a woman's breast with a baby attached to it than it would be for him to see a man's. It is just what's normal. (And as a side note, in reply to the original post, is it really so offensive for people to *hear* a baby suckling? How is it any more offensive to hear a baby suckling at his mother's breast than it is to hear a baby suckling at an artificial nipple?)

dimor said...

11:30 AM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

Hello everyone, I've read a few comments on this thread and, I just want to say that I think that breastfeeding in public is ok depending where you are at. It also depends on what society you live in, and even how you have been brought up. Breastfeeding in public should be totally normal for everybody, for the feeders and the viewers. Since we are all different, when you breastfeed there is no reason for you not to cover up, to avoid curious people. In Spain you see nursing moms in the bus and on the streets, it's not a big deal. And just to finish up my post, I want to say that breastfeeding in sacrament meeting don't seem to the best idea. That is why the Chapels have speakers in more rooms than just the nursing room(in case it gets too crowed).

altorock13 said...

12:01 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I find it interesting that several people have said that it is a sacred or a spiritual experience between a mother and a baby to experience breastfeeding, yet they don't want to keep the experience just between them and their baby. I'm all for the comments that you need to feed the baby, etc, but when you try and bring it to a spiritual level, that's about when I stop listening. If in fact it is such a spiritual or sacred moment between a mother and a child, you should not force your "spiritualism" on other people. It is not a spiritual moment for them. The other aspect of many of these comments I have a problem with is the fact that your church speaks of modesty and teaching people to be modest, but as long as you are breast feeding, it is okay not to show that modesty and it is up to the people around you to not be bothered. I wonder what your President would say to this? I would in fact be very interested to hear from the presidency of the mormon church on this view. It seems interesting to me that you will be up in arms over wearing leggings to church under shorter dresses (I read the comments on that article), but then you are up in arms because people are asking breastfeeding women to at least cover up when you are in public. Contrary views perhaps? You cannot take world views such as women who are immodest and use them to justify your views when it fits. Either your church preaches modesty and covering up, or it doesn't. If it did not, then those people asking you to at least cover up would have no ground to stand on, but be respectful of the people around you. They may not share your views on this very intimate subject. Isn't the Mormon church one that preaches respect for others?

beebefox said...

12:09 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I don't see anything wrong with a mother nursing her baby, but I do think it should be done in private. If it absolutely can't be done in private, then be discreet as possible and cover up. It's still a private area that is being exposed and shouldn't be shown to other men, teens, and children. Very young children probably wouldn't care or understand, but older children would and should not be nursed around. If you are in a very public area with men and children around you should probably go to a private area to nurse, also if you are being very distracting to others. When I was first married and going to church in a student ward, there was a woman who would sit right in the middle pew in sacrament and nurse. She would put on a poncho to cover up, but like the author mentioned, it was very distracting and you could hear it as well. That's why there are nursing rooms in the church where you can still hear the meeting. If they are full, even sitting in the foyer or other designated rooms you can still hear the speakers and you aren't distracting from the meeting. When others are trying to focus on something important like a church meeting where we are trying to get our spiritual fill for the week, it is selfish to take that atmosphere away from others. To be fair, if I was bottle feeding and had a noisy eater, I would take my baby out of the meeting as well, because it is disrupting the meeting for others. I have nursed all my children and am a very private person, but I am very aware of being courteous of others' feelings and rights as well. I always went to a private room to nurse if there were lots of people around and I always covered up. Just because nursing is a natural thing doesn't mean we need to flaunt ourselves for others to see. I'm sure your baby won't starve if you take a few minutes to find an area that is a bit more private and it certainly won't hurt anyone if you cover up.

hcarter73 said...

12:09 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I would not nurse in Sacrament meeting - not cool! I would not feel bad about nursing in Relief Society with a cover if my baby was a quiet and discreet nurser, which she is not. LOL! I have nursed in restaurants with a cover before and felt a little awkward about it, but sometimes you don't have many choices. I believe nursing is perfectly natural but that being said, I also believe in modesty and don't feel the whole world needs to see my breast while I am feeding my child. That is why there are Mother's Rooms at church.

leecyn said...

12:16 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

Just because something is natural doesn't mean we need to expose others to it. Having sex, in order to have that baby, is also natural. I don't however, want to watch you do it. Having a bowel movement is also natural but there are reasons why there are doors on the restrooms. And there are many things that were acceptable in Jesus' day that simply are not now.

milt said...

01:03 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

First, I am in favor of a mother breast feeding her child. My wife breast fed all of our children and it was a wonderful experience for all, including myself as I would watch her feed them at times. I agree with the comments that there are a lot of natural things that occur in life, but I do not believe that they all are appropriate to be shared with everyone. I appreciate those who want to have their rights protected, and they should be. What about the rights of those who might be upset with this natural show and are uncomfortable with it. Who and how are their rights protected? I have been taught all of my life that you have the right to do the things that you please until you encroach on the rights of others, then it is not so right to insist that your rights should be dominant. I think that too often in the name of not hurting others the voice of the vocal minority over rules the voice and concern of the silent majority which is read as condoning the right of the minority. One last thought. I remember as a young missionary in a South American country getting on a public bus and having a woman bare her breast and begin feeding her child. I remembered the struggle and challenge of young man trying not to spend time dwelling on the natural female form and having a very intimate thing shared with me against my will. That coupled with standing on a bus where my height did not allow me to look very many other places except at her breast, it was very difficult. Some intimate things are better left for a more intimate and proper place.

wmc113 said...

01:09 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I filled out the poll with my wife giving me the answers. She feels there are some places it is inappropriate to nurse. I personally think that some of the above commentors are right a lot of men and boys if they actually see the breast will have sexual feelings from it even though the mother is just nursing.

lovebeingamom said...

02:14 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I am very pro breastfeeding. I'm about to deliver my sixth child and I have and will nurse my baby pretty much anywhere. That said, I do use a nursing cover so I'm not exposing my breast to everyone. I've nursed in the grocery store, in the mall, you name it! With a cover, I don't think there is anything anyone will see that should make them uncomfortable. When the naked breast is not exposed to the world, there is no reason for one to be uncomfortable. I do not nurse in sacrament meeting though. Most of my babies are somewhat noisy nursers and I feel it is a distraction. My sister does nurse in sacrament meeting as she has several small children and her husband is on the stand, but she does use a cover. Sometimes we moms just do the best we can. And many times the mother's lounge is standing room only and all chit-chat and gossip, making it hard to listen. I do have a teenage son, so I agree with the comments about boys and men being exposed to a naked breast, even though it is natural. But especially with a nursing cover, I think there needs to be more tolerance and understanding and recognition that breast feeding is NOT a public sexual act!

robynwoods said...

02:15 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I do believe there are some places that are inappropriate to nurse, but I believe those places are different for each woman and it should be only her decision. I am a first time mother of a 10 month old living in the east coast of Canada where it is luckily actually illegal to ask a woman to not nurse in public. My daughter will not let me put anything over her head while nursing but I have been able to learn how to use a blanket and my shirt to cover up as well as possible. Although I do not feel comfortable nursing in a place like our sacrament room I feel like it should be a woman's choice and not judged either way. I know personally I go to the mother's lounge, but absolutely hate it as I feel like a reject in a tiny room all alone.

lrb said...

03:20 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I'm a mom of 10 and nursed all of them. That meant that some were older when they had younger siblings. I was very careful to not do anything that would embarrass the older children in front of their friends. Some of my children specifically asked me to please not nurse the babies in front of anyone and I honored their wishes because there are ages when you are more sensitive than others. I served a mission in Ecuador and even as an adult I was shocked at how casual it was to openly nurse on busses, in the store, on the street and without covering at all. Also the children nursed up until 3-4 years of age. I know it's a cultural thing. I don't think any of the boys there who saw it were "turned on". On the other hand, our gringo Elders had a really hard time knowing where to put their eyes while interacting with nursing moms. They got used to it though. Go with the customs of your area and with the utmost modesty of covered breasts. It really affects the decisions your daughters will make about whether nursing is gross or beautiful.

michaelm said...

03:34 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

It all depends on how you do it. I have free wheeling earthly friends; think Berkley, Birkenstocks and deadlocks who whip out breasts to feed their 4 year olds at the park and take their time leaving their breasts out deliberately pretending to be uncaring while thy are obviously hoping people are watching. Then complain about how men need to get used to it, that is taking it to the extreme as are many of the comments here. A little modesty is really not so complex and most men couldn't care less if you toss on a simple coverup. All to often women push the limit of appropriateness in selfish ways then deliberately cry fowl while obviously trying to get noticed pushing the limits of tight clothes, or skin exposure, stretching altering or wearing oversized garments so they can expose more then complain about men or boys watching them and how it's someone else's fault that women get sexualized, even at church. There is nothing wrong with public breast feeding, just place a simple cover over yourself, and cover back up while covered. There simply is no reason to expose your breasts at the mall, church, restaurant or any other public place. And if you choose to exposure your breasts publicly you have no right to cry fowl if it makes people stare or some feel uncomfortable it was your choice. It's easy to be modest, even in public and no reason you have to expose your breast or breasts to others. It takes little effort to cover and I know plenty of breast feeding women who manage to do it discreetly where most people never even notice or care. If you seem to be unable or unwilling to breast feed without showing off your breasts you have only yourself to consider for people noticing regardless if they are bothered or not, people will notice an exposed breast, leg, mid section or bust-line. It has nothing to do with being natural or not, it is simple modesty to toss on a cover when breast feeding in public.

loraking said...

03:40 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I feel that it is inappropriate to nurse in the chapel. Our building doesn't have a Mother's Room, but we have the Nursery set for nursing moms during Sacrament. If there isn't any other options it should be done with a cover-up. After that the mom's are encouraged to use the Primary room or library. I feel that wherever it is appropriate for us to eat it is appropriate for an infant to nurse.

moss said...

04:20 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

When I nurse in public, I use a blanket. That being said, I will defend to the death the right of any mother to nurse in public and not cover up. Often making an effort to cover up only draws more attention and becomes less discreet. Also, nursing falls outside culturally defined ideas of modesty or sexuality. You uptight sexually repressed men just need to get over it. I'd be more concerned about what is hanging in the window of Victoria's Secret as a threat to your virtue than what you might see from a nursing mom.

mommadi said...

04:38 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

The only time I worried about where I nursed was when I was sitting directly across from a man and he had no where else to look but at me. That said, when did our society "accept" sexual attire as a way of life and nothing can be done about it, and yet no some do feel bad about asking a mom to quit feeding a hungry baby. Before I ever told a mother to quit feeding her hungry baby, I would walk up to every woman in the place who was sexually dressed and tell her to cover up. And since I am not ever going to do that....... nurse away moms.

aleisha5 said...

04:40 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I have nursed in public, including once at a water park, sitting on a curb, covered by a beach towel simply because there was no other place. That being said, I prefer to nurse in private, I love being able to fully concentrate on my baby. In public, I cover up, but I always feel like some part of my skin is showing, whether front, back or side and I can't be fully comfortable. I also think nursing in sacrament is distracting, whether it's from noisy eaters (mine always were), subsequent burping, or other people (little children especially) gawking. The distractions can take away from the spirit of the meeting. As to nursing without a cover, I would never do that in public, does not matter to me how society feels about breasts, these are my breasts and I don't show them to just anybody!

wmb said...

05:11 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I have raised a family and breastfed all of them " In private" All our married daughters are doing the same. I have always be guided by the 1st line of a Primary song... " If the Savior stood beside me..would I do the things I do " I would not feel comfortable nursing my baby, covered or uncovered with the Savior beside me. Not because I feel he would judge me or that breast feeding is a bad thing etc, but because of my love and respect for him and how sacred our bodies are and the experience of nurturing. My level of modesty would not allow me to do so. Taking that further, the Savior says that if you do it unto one of the these the least of my bretheren...you do it unto me. So, I have shown the same love and respect to others around me at church or in the community and kept the whole experince sacred. I cannot imagine our Heavenly Mother doing any different. I'm not saying that those of you who do, are doing the wrong thing, but we need to be a bit prayerful and see what our Heavenly Father feels about it and not just what we want to do. We need to involve him more in these sort of decisions. At times it has been a bit difficult to find a private place, but I said a prayer and all was provided for me. When I went shopping, I asked Heavenly Father to help me get a car space that was in the shade, and I always found one....just perfect if I needed to feed when shopping. My husband was on the stand a lot too in Sacrament, so enlisted the help of a lovely couple who sat with my other children when I needed to feed the baby. There was a room set aside with speakers to hear the talks etc, but even when it wasn't working, I never felt left out. I still felt the spirit nuture me as I was seeing to the needs of one of Heavenly Fathers children. altorock13 ...yes we are a church that teaches modesty and respect for others. The Standards for the youth teach us modesty in ALL things. Our previous Prophet taught us to dress modestly according to the circumstances eg... we don't get around the house or community in our swimmers...if we are at the beach, that is where we wear them. If we are at church, we were the appropriate clothes etc. Modesty is something we strive to cultivate in all aspects of our lives.

momofoz said...

05:32 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

Have you seen this: women nursing in sacrament meeting in the early church! http://rixarixa.blogspot.com/2010/08/breastfeeding-history-moment-lds.html that is how it should be and the fact that it isn't is a pathetic portrayal of our oversexualized culture. Its insulting to men to say that they can't see a mother breastfeeding and see it for only that and nothing sexual. Breastfeeding in sacrament meeting is ok and every mother should feel that way. sad that they don't.

tallskiwife said...

05:36 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

A sticky subject indeed! I always tried to find a secluded space to nurse- always. I have noticed mom's nursing in the chapel before and thought that was a little strange. Maybe only because at that point it's a room where everyone else is a captured audience, and any number of places in the building would be less occupied at that time. I would say 'no' to just about any place with boys ages about 8 and up, unless very discrete and covered.

amshelle said...

05:38 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I am now breastfeeding my third baby and my feelings and practices have evolved with each baby. With my first, I always covered when in public and used the Mother's Room at church, every single time. With my second, I nursed wherever I was, but used a cover. Now with my third, I nurse uncovered, wherever I am, unless *I* feel more comfortable in the Mother's Room. I feel, unequivocally, that it is a mother's right and privilege to nurse her baby wherever, whenever she wants (with the obvious caveats to safety). I don't believe for one moment that it is immodest or somehow unsavory for a woman to nurse uncovered or in the presence of others, including men and boys. As other people have commented, the discomfort with public breastfeeding is a societal/cultural issue. It is NOT a modesty/doctrine/righteousness issue AT ALL. Unfamiliarity breeds discomfort. By not seeing breastfeeding, we become uncomfortable around it. It is a disservice to everyone, that we scandalize and undermine the nourishment of our children as our Heavenly Father designed it. Mothers of babies and young children feel isolated enough, why must we isolate them even more? In another vein, you have to look at the practicality of it as well. It may not have been a big deal with my first baby to get up and go to the Mothers Room, but it has gotten harder with each baby. I have older kids who get nervous and clingy if I get up and walk out. It is disruptive to my family and everyone around me to get up and climb over people to go to the Mothers Room. I have callings I need to fulfill during church and spending more time in the Mothers Room is a big burden on me and those I am serving. If I nurse where I am (Sacrament Meeting, Sunday School, Primary, Relief Society, etc), I can calm and take care of my baby much faster. There are times when I know she is rather distractible or my clothing is such that adjusting it to nurse would create a ton of attention and disruption. In those times, I choose to go to the Mothers Room because it is the least disruptive option. But more often than not, it's easier to nurse right where I am, for everyone. And really, why is everyone so worried about my breasts? Shouldn't they be paying attention to the lessons & talks, not about how my baby is eating?

signingemma said...

06:31 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

Inappropriate places to nurse...in a job interview.

racheljl said...

06:42 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I nursed both my kids, my oldest for 19 months and my youngest for 14 months. There were so many babies in our ward (a student family ward) that there wasn't always room in the nursing area, despite the large couch and recliner they graciously provided. When my babies were small enough to nurse under cover, I nursed in sacrament meeting. When they got old enough to pull off the cover, I'd go to the nursing room. We lived in Berkeley, and no one seemed to mind nursing babies. With my daughter, in L.A., it was the same. With both kids, I dreaded having to nurse in a public place. If there was a dressing room, I'd use that. If not, I'd sit in a quiet corner on the floor. Sometimes there is nowhere else to go. I'd never heard of anyone asking a nursing mom to use a bathroom stall until recently! Unbelievable. All those germs would not be good for the baby. I can see trying to be modest, but otherwise, I think it would be best if people tried to be understanding. I don't think I ever flashed anyone except at home, in private.

jerusalemmom said...

06:53 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

Oh, sigh. This should not even be a controversy. All of my boys have been raised around nursing moms, without covers, and none of them have a problem with "sexual issues" like the men who commented above. The plastic surgery billboards all over Salt Lake City are much worse. I nurse without a cover as well, and I love the pictures of women nursing in general conference sessions, without covers. I also refuse to feed a child in and around toilets. Disgusting.

anne-marie said...

07:27 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

Oh rubish! Nursing is the most natural thing in the world. I do think that nursing in public while covered it totally acceptable and yes even at church. And certainly not in the toilets. Nursing is a very personal thing and far from my mind to tell a woman what she should or should not do. I trust that woman have enough judgment to do what is best for themselves and their children. And frankly, there are issues so much more important to talk about in this world then butt in to a nursing mom's business. If you want to nurse in public that is your choice and if you choose to do so in private it is also your priogative. Enough already of those trivial subjects!

kboz said...

07:41 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I nursed my 4 children and I agree with the article author, I don't feel it's pornographic or exposing, but I don't want people doing it out in the open in public. I always used a blanket IF I had to do it in public. I figure a feeding baby is better than a screaming baby, but COVER UP to be sure. Also I don't think sacrament meeting is the place to do it- we have nursing mother's rooms, although granted in my ward I kept fighting for one and never got it- we only had a corner in the women's bathroom which I hated- cold and distracting for baby.

litchick1027 said...

07:57 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I look forward to the day (and may it come with great speed!) when breastfeeding is about nourishment, comfort, normal feeding, and love instead of a huge debate about "modesty." I breastfeed my kid just about anywhere. I think nothing screams !!BREASTFEEDING!! like one of those gigantic nursing tents. If I cover up, I use a big filmy scarf to conceal the offending bit of side boob that might make an appearance. People are welcome to look *anywhere else* besides at my baby nursing. If they do look, I really couldn't care less. I'm not trying to make a statement, I'm certainly not trying to expose anybody, and I'm doing about the most natural, normal thing my body is capable of doing. The World Health Organization recommends breastfeeding until at least age 2. It's absurd to ask breastfeeding moms to spend their lives either in pursuit of a place to hide so they can feed their babies, or to stay home lest anyone catch a glimpse. Get over it, people.

mamareese said...

08:02 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

It is in appropriate to nurse a baby in a bathroom. Or anywhere you wouldn't like to have a snack.

nanadover said...

08:06 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

I breast fed all 5 of my children and now support my 5 girls breastfeeding my grandbabies. It is the most natural and healthiest way to feed an infant, and I have no problem with women doing it in public if they are modest. If some are distracted or disturbed by a baby nursing, then a fussy or crying baby must drive them nuts! As far as the noises of a nursing baby, small children make much more noise when everyone else is quiet. I think we spend to much time worrying about what someone else might be doing when we should be minding our own business and concentrating on what we are doing that distracts or annoys others!

dclownfish03 said...

08:59 PM
on Jan 19, 2012

Report Abuse

There is no reason not to nurse a baby when and where they are hungry. I don't eat with a blanket over my head, nor have I ever seen another adult or child do so, so why on earth would I make my baby eat that way? The mother's room is often a chat room that smells like a diaper pail so I have no desire to nurse there, especially when I miss out on the teachings and spirit of the lessons/talks by doing so. Because past generations started believing that formula was just as good, or breastfeeding should be hidden, a lot of people have that frame of mind today, even though they only say they are uncomfortable seeing it. If everyone saw babies eat the way our bodies were designed it wouldn't be an issue! Here's an article I love about this - http://thebabeandbreast.blogspot.com/2011/07/real-reason-not-to-cover-up-nursing.html

abigail said...

02:40 AM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

Breastfeeding is not done "in public" or "in private", It is just DONE for the baby, and as much as it is normalized, the better for anyone. I am puzzled that this is still an issue, and the terrible thing is that here, in Spain, where breastfeeding everywhere when needed was perfectly normal 30 years ago, now we are "importing" this policy, mostly in Church, were I have seen the first nursing burkas. I breastfed my toddlers even in sacrament meeting with no comment or problem by anyone. Inmodest? please! We are not responsible for male thoughts or behavior, whatever inmodest they could be(by the way, I wonder about american male hormons that prevent them from seing breast as anything but sexual, how is it possible that other cultures male hormones do not act the same way?.

abigail said...

02:52 AM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

It offends me the very thought of the Savior seing me breastfeeding and doing other thing that smiling.

karenvs said...

07:02 AM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

Good heavens, do we have hang-ups or what? 74% use a cover or don't nurse in public at all? I guess I shouldn't be surprised. I have seen mothers covering up *in their own homes* when I've been visiting teaching. Why on earth would a mother cover up in her own home while nursing in front of two other mothers? It makes no sense to me. And it has nothing to do with seeing breasts. If people don't want their husbands and sons to see any amount of breast then they can't let them watch TV, because there's way more breast tissue hanging out on any given TV program than I've ever seen a mother show while nursing her baby in public. Nudity isn't the issue. What disturbs people is that the baby is sucking on a woman's nipple and people can't make the mental separation between that and sex. 63% answered that there are places where it's inappropriate to breastfeed; I have to wonder how many of those respondents would consider it inappropriate to give their baby a bottle in those same places.

runningmom said...

07:33 AM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

I am saddened by some of the responses on here. Our loving Father in Heaven created us perfectly. He knew how often our beautiful little babies would need to be nourished. Do you think he intended us to hide for our childrens' first years of life? Our breasts are not indecent. It is not immodest to use them to feed a child. Many of us nurse in public without a cover, and do so modestly. The only reason I don't feed in sacrament meeting or other block meetings is because I am scared of offending somebody and them making a big deal about it, not because I think it is inappropriate. I think it is very sad that at a time when I am in desperate need of spiritual nourishment I am banished to the mothers room. Where strangely enough 99% of women cover up anyway, so why not do it elsewhere? There is nothing impolite or immodest about a baby eating. The problem is Satan has equated breasts as solely sexual objects, and he has been especially sucessful at this in American society. It is a shame that through this perverse tactic he has been somewhat able to change our thinking pertaining to what God meant to be normal and acceptable. This is not right, ladies. If our husbands, brothers, and sons saw mothers breastfeeding uncovered everywhere, I suspect many of them would have much less of an issue with pornography, especially our dear sons.

fran_patterson said...

09:24 AM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

I cannot believe some of these comments. Breastfeeding is natural. It's how God designed babies to be nourished. While it's nice to be considerate of others when possible, I don't see why any mother should ever have to go to another room, or cover up to nurse her child. The way nursing mothers are currently treated in Church does nothing in terms of supporting motherhood. It only deprives many women of the spiritual nourishment they could enjoy in Church if only they could nurse when and where they see fit. Mother's lounges are NOT a great option. They're often noisy, or smelly, or uncomfortable. And why should I go hide anyway for feeding myself. I have yet to see mothers go into hiding to feed their toddlers some cheerios or fruit. I understand that for some seeing a bit of breast can be uncomfortable. However, there's far more "breast" out in the world. If our men and boys don't learn now to handle a bit of breast for one of its proper functions, how will they survive the "world"? I also think it's important to consider that nations far more conservative than our Mormon culture (like some predominantly Islamic middle eastern nations) are ok with breastfeeding. If some of the most "modest" nations out there can survive seeing a bit of breast for breastfeeding, why on earth can't we????

pertybear said...

02:19 PM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

I must say that I am amazed that the word "exposed" is being used so often to describe a breastfeeding mom. As a mom who has breastfeed four children, I am saddened and annoyed that anyone would use that term. I would like someone to measure the amount of breast that is visible when a mom is breast feeding. You have a baby in front blocking most of the view. Most women that I have seen breastfeeding do not strip down to the waist to nurse when in the company of others (although that is a good way to get rid of unwanted guest). Instead they lift their shirt and let their baby nurse. You see more "exposed" breasts (and other female parts) on magazine covers, TV, Movies, the beach or pool, and in every Mall and High School in our country!! If every one of those women were "exposing" themselves by breastfeed instead, what a more wonderful world we would have. As to where a woman should or should not breastfeed - anywhere SHE chooses, whether that is in a restaurant, on a train or plane, in church or in a quiet room alone. Pretty much anywhere except a public bathroom since that can just be icky. And to those around her, look at her eyes, instead of worrying about her breast. She will feel like a real person, instead of someone who needs to hide. The ironic thing is that people scream about modesty when they see a nusing baby but not when they see the images in the other places I mentioned above. I had a friend in the Las Vegas airport be asked by an airline worker to stop nursing because it was making others uncomfortable. However the girly poster where you could see just about everything but the woman's nipples did not make people uncomfortable enough to make them remove it. Maybe we need to be more uncomfortable with the things that are actually intended to make us have immoral thoughts than to be uncomfortable about a woman just feeding her baby. Also I just have to comment to the woman who said she could not nurse in front of the Savior - I do not think they had invented nursing tents or covers with velcro tabs in Christ's time, so I am pretty sure you would not be the first woman he has seen nursing a baby.

karenchallis said...

02:33 PM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

Dear bjr, Let's try to make breatsfeeding the cultural norm in the church. I breast fed my sons some 40 years ago & am a vocal proponent of it. In cultures where bare breasts are the every day norm in dress standards, the men are not sensitized to the sight of them and therefore are likely not sexually aroused by them. They have no less testosterone than North American men. The sexualization of breasts is a sickness of western civilization. A couple of centuries & more ago high society European ladies wore very low cut necklines with breast flesh spilling over their corsets but would not dare show their ankles for fear of arousing courtiers. Even in our day some men are more turned on by the nape of a woman's neck than by bare breasts that are becoming commonplace in society. I believe in modesty but I believe even more passionately in the acceptance of breast feeding. We need to teach our sons as well as or daughters the true god given purpose of womens' breasts. They were not created as sex objects. Perhaps with education we can over come the fetish that drives so many women to implants & others to fear defeminization from mastectomies more than they fear death from breast cancer!

aja said...

09:20 PM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

the only places which are inappropriate for a breastfeeding mother to feed her baby are filthy bathrooms or other dirty places. I am a Certified Lactation Counselor. I prefer women to nurse discreetly in mixed company but only because some people are so uptight and have weird feelings about it and moms should not have to deal with other people's prejudices. Absolutely, a woman should NOT be made to feel she needs to leave Relief Society to nurse. That's way past ridiculous! I once observed a mother nursing twins in a Sunday school class with the folding wall partially drawn so she could hear but not be seen. The Sunday School president demanded she go to the bathroom, being clueless of a] how long it took her to actually get ready for church and b]how much lesson time she would miss nursing her twins. Thank goodness for a Bishop who encouraged her to stay where she could hear and who put the other brother in his place. This may sound ridiculous but I was there and saw it happen. As a culture and especially in our homes, we need to educate those around us to the health and emotional benefits of breastfeeding for both mother and child instead of even having to deal with this subject over and over. There is such a need in the church for parents in general to teach healthy attitudes towards sexuality and normal body functions. Breastfeeding is beautiful and if someone is not covered because they grew up in a different part of the world and are not used to the Americans' hypocritical view of breast functions, then please get over it and look elsewhere!

aja said...

09:24 PM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

I forgot to add that I truly find bottlefeeding to be offensive and wonder why anyone would do such a thing. It is germridden and often quite filthy and formula is a pitifully poor substitute for wonderful, God-given breastmilk!

oilstories said...

09:58 PM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

I address this remark specifically at the LDS population: Please don't expect me to nurse my baby in the bathroom. It is absolutely HEINOUS that in too many LDS buildings, especially branches, there is NO nursing mother's lounge. Furthermore, I have been to church historic sites and visitor's centers that also had no nursing facilities available for nursing mothers and where did they stick me so I wouldn't "offend" patrons? In the bathroom. Do YOU like to eat YOUR meals in the same room where someone is relieving themselves at the same time they are doing so? Furthermore, most nursing lounges available in LDS buildings are entirely inadequate. Usually there is some tiny cubicle in a stake center building, and 20+ women all trying to find someplace to go with their babies. Why should I be punished for choosing, as a mother, to have my baby bond to me and not to a thing? (pacifier, softie, blankie, teddy bear... anything but Mom) Why should I have to be punished while the mothers who rely on plastic and silicone replacements of themselves are welcomed to stay at meetings, and called "good mothers" for sticking the plug in their children's mouths, rocking them in carseats, and even sticking them in strollers and wheeling them around the church building? In the meantime, I am scolded for "spoiling" my child by babywearing, breastfeeding, and attachment parenting. But if I heeded the people in the great and spacious building, my children would be just like theirs.

oilstories said...

10:05 PM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

P.S. Furthermore, please forgive my baby for the happy sound of sucking. When people think baby is at a bottle, nobody seems to care... but boy-oh-boy it's like somebody cut a very BIG hunk of cheese in the adult Sunday School class when a tiny baby under a blanket happens to sound happy.

pamudy said...

10:58 PM
on Jan 20, 2012

Report Abuse

http://rixarixa.blogspot.com/2010/08/breastfeeding-history-moment-lds.html It's an illustration from Harper's Weekly of an 1871 Sacrament Meeting in the Mormon Tabernacle in Salt Lake City, Utah.

jice said...

09:35 AM
on Jan 21, 2012

Report Abuse

I think it's ridiculous that so many people think that "modest" means using a nursing cover (a large tent basically) to cover the entire baby and much of the mother. Can't I nurse modestly without a cover? If I'm not showing any breast will you be offended that I don't have a tent covering the baby? It takes practice, but it's easy to nurse modestly without covering yourself with a tarp. I've answered the door while nursing my children and most of the time the visitors didn't even realize that I was feeding them. Please I beg you let us stop SHAMING women into hiding (whether it be into a private place or under a tarp) when they are breastfeeding. This sends a message to the women, children, and the rest of society that there is something dirty about breastfeeding.

jice said...

09:38 AM
on Jan 21, 2012

Report Abuse

Also, if you find it offensive I invite you to look away. You cannot control what other people are doing. You cannot control if a woman is wearing a low cut shirt, or if someone bends over to show some crack... what you can control is your own eyes. You are welcome to exercise that right, but a woman nursing in public isn't taking your right away from you whatsoever.

djljejmnesbitt said...

10:09 AM
on Jan 21, 2012

Report Abuse

I think it's ok if Mom is completely covered. No one (well, maybe a few sickos) wants to see boobs hanging out in public. I've come across women who just let it all hang out in the mall in the name of it being "natural", and it's really gross. For me, what it really comes down to is a special,sacred thing between mom & baby and shouldn't be treated so casually in front of others.

marriedwoman said...

10:56 AM
on Jan 21, 2012

Report Abuse

Nursing is beautiful and natural - but it should be private. There are many natural and normal body, relationship - and religious - activities that are not for public eyes. Nursing in public is inconsiderate of those who feel uncomfortable with it. Sometimes the nursing mother is just plain arrogant and obnoxious about it. I never nursed in public (seven children( unless there was NO other option. And then, I was always covered up and as private as possible.

cubby said...

11:37 AM
on Jan 21, 2012

Report Abuse

Years ago when nursing was not so popular I was a nursing mother who wanted my children to have the best. I rarely nursed in public, but occasionally I did, for instance if I was in a store and the child was fussing to be feed and making a ruckus. I always covered and made every effort to be discrete. There were not places to go back then as there are so often now. The funniest thing was that I never nursed a child in the chapel or classroom at church, we did have a room set aside for nursing, but the rumor in the ward was that I did. I feel that human touch is essential for babies so when ever possible I always held my babies, never even owned a baby carrier so when I held my contented, sleeping babies at church people thought I was nursing. There was also this crazy rumor that I used breast milk in my cooking. I have no idea where that came from or who started it. Funny, people never asked me to bring stuff to ward socials. Then when I found out twenty years later it made sense. The rumor mill in the LDS ward was active, very active. They create and maintain their own reality. Debrah

megtaylor said...

08:53 PM
on Jan 21, 2012

Report Abuse

I just retread my previous comment and wanted to clarify feeling "rage" at hearing moms BF in the bathroom. I simply meant that no mother should feel so uncomfortable or ashamed of breast feeding that she feels she must feed her baby on a public toilet. We don't eat in the bathroom because it's GROSS. And breast feeding is a natural act that should not have to be done in a place where people poop. There's no shame in feeding your baby. I just think it can be done with sensitivity toward others.

rlayton said...

10:44 AM
on Jan 22, 2012

Report Abuse

I have no issues at all about breastfeeding in public, however there is a point I would like to make as a young men's leader. Unfortuntely breasts are protrayed in our society as a way to attract men. Clothes are worn that reveal that portion of a women's body. Clothes that show cleavage and size are not for the purpose of educating on the benefits of breastfeeding. I think most (but not all) LDS women try very hard to dress modestly but the rest of the world does not. In fact, what the young men see and learn through the media and example is that "breasts" are a sexual thing not a way to nourish an enfant. Is there any wonder as to why they are uncomfortable when they are exposed to it. I heard a wise man once say "when society creates a negative situation it is almost impossible to reverse, but we should still try". Pray for the young men!!

rc7 said...

08:50 PM
on Jan 22, 2012

Report Abuse

How unfortunate that it is perfectly fine for our women and girls to wear shirts low cut enough to show cleavage and to show breasts when they lean forward, (look around at church) but people feel "uncomfortable" when they can hear an infant eating- even when the mother is feeding discreetly? Do they also feel "uncomfortable" to hear an infant nursing on a bottle? Seriously? What's wrong with this picture? Obviously, nursing fully exposed in public places is not generally accepted in the USA, but why should a mother have to retreat to a bathroom to feed her infant? I say practice at home to learn to feed discreetly and then don't be ashamed. Unless we are all willing to start wearing baggy turtlenecks and skirts to our ankles, don't fool yourself that nursing is too sexual for public.

justjena said...

01:58 AM
on Jan 23, 2012

Report Abuse

The places I'd say it's "inappropriate" to breastfeed are places that you're either forced, coaxed, coerced, or pressured to breastfeed. "Why don't you take that into the bathroom" is a favorite. The BATHROOM? That's disgusting. And uncomfortable. And smelly. And cruel. Otherwise, if it's a place a babe-in-arms or toddler is allowed to go, a babe-in-arms or toddler should be allowed and accepted to nurse.

timberprincess said...

10:13 AM
on Jan 23, 2012

Report Abuse

I have to say that at church I always fed my babies in the mothers room. But something happened with my first son that made me feel unashamed about feeding my child. We were out with my In-Laws for dinner. I kept leaving the table to feed the baby(newborn; he couldn't decide if he was hungry or tired) and finaly my mother in law looked at me and said if you don't feel right breast feeding him in public maybe you should just use a bottle. Now she was not in support of my breast feeding and her comment was ment to sting but instead I used that moment to reflect. I will be feeding this baby for at least a year and I better get over my fear of offending someone and nourish my child. I have not felt the need to remove myself since then (except church)and I have had four children. I did always make sure I was covered and no one could see 'me'.

chamberlain2 said...

12:25 PM
on Jan 23, 2012

Report Abuse

It is true, with our social upbringing ESP. In the church we have been taught so much about modesty that I think we forget what some of our "sacred parts" are intended for-- feeding our babies in this case. In other countries mothers nurse in public with no cover without hesitation. In the church, nursing covers are prevalent. I nursed both my girls for a year and always use a cover out in public just because having been taught to be modest I personally do not feel comfortable showing skin. But I do not hesitate to feed my baby in public. They need to eat. I do sometimes feel uncomfortable if I am surrounded by men but I simply make sure I am covered and if they feel uncomfortable they can leave. There Are some places I don't think you should nurse in-- if there is a mothers room then go to it during sacrament. I also wouldn't nurse in a professional place where I wouldn't bring my baby and feed it any other way either. Nor would I at an elementary school like if you go to meet your kid for lunch. Just nurse before, otherwise you will have a lot of inquisitive little ones...

farrangel said...

12:29 PM
on Jan 23, 2012

Report Abuse

I say <b>AMEN</b> to <b>azmomof6</b> and all her comments. I breastfed my 4 babies from the years of 1993 - 2001 and am the daughter of a mom who breastfed the last 7 of her 9 kids (I was oldest saw saw it all). I breastfed my babies everywhere and anywhere. In my day we didn't really have nursing covers (which in many ways just draw more attention), so I employed the same tricks <b>azmomof6</b> mentioned... but only to show consideration for others, as I feel there is NOTHING immodest or awkward about a woman feeding her baby the way our Father in Heaven designed. It is very unfortunate so many women in the Church feel this is a problem and others exposing their sons or husbands to it isn't right. Three of the four babies I breastfed are boys and I told all of them (and still do) that they need to adjust THEIR attitude it if bothers them. I have yet to come across an active LDS women who is TRYING to expose herself through this, so while I respect others' right to want privacy or coverage, I feel we need to stop looking at this is a sexualized way. Please love yourselves, women, and don't see this as something you need to hide or judge others for doing out in the open.

mamatomany said...

04:47 PM
on Jan 25, 2012

Report Abuse

I breastfed my babies and firmly believe that, other than my operating a moving vehicle, any place I could be with my baby was an appropriate place to nurse. I did nurse modestly with a blanket thrown over my shoulder when in mixed company, although I do believe moms can nurse modestly through positioning of clothing alone. It breaks my heart to think that moms feel the need to leave church meetings--especially Relief Society--to feed their babies. My teenage boys (15, 14, 13--and very interested in girls) wandered in as I was reading this. I told them that some people feel that moms shouldn't nurse their babies in sacrament meeting. My 15 year old asked if they expected moms to take their babies home to nurse. My 14 year old poked him in the ribs and said that maybe they wanted moms to nurse in the bathroom, ha ha ha. I told them that some people felt exactly that way and my boys were stunned. "They're just feeding their babies" and "why would anyone care if a mom feeds a baby" were comments I heard. I told them that some people felt that men wouldn't be able to control inappropriate thoughts about women's bodies if a mom were nursing. They just stared at me. "What's inappropriate about a baby eating?" and "why are they looking that closely at a lady's chest anyway?" I also feel that the Savior, would not think there was anything wrong with a mom nursing her baby in His presence. After all, caring for the least of these, is exactly what He taught.

earussell said...

12:07 AM
on Jan 26, 2012

Report Abuse

Jackie @ 9:45 I'm not sure who told you that the breastfeeding mothers in the murals at the Cardston temple had been painted over. I go there regularly and they are still there! I actually made a very small blog about it with pictures once: ldsbreastfeedingart.blogspot.com There are quite a few examples of breastfeeding mothers in LDS art. Look at the Seagull Monument on Temple Square next time you are there!!!

londoner said...

04:50 AM
on Jan 26, 2012

Report Abuse

There is a simple solution to this. Ladies, wear a baby sling. Then, when your baby wants to feed it can feed without you having to 'uncover' anything. You are already covered. You don't have to get up and leave Sacrament or any other public place. They are comfortable too. Most people don't even realise the baby is feeding just looking at the Mother. All the comments are just making mountains where there really don't need to be any.

danieldot9 said...

09:23 AM
on Jan 26, 2012

Report Abuse

It is completely inappropriate that breastfeeding lounges are in bathrooms! Would you eat at a restaurant that seated you in the bathroom?

lyno said...

09:34 AM
on Jan 26, 2012

Report Abuse

There have been many excellent points but I have to address aja's last comment; I forgot to add that I truly find bottlefeeding to be offensive and wonder why anyone would do such a thing. It is germridden and often quite filthy and formula is a pitifully poor substitute for wonderful, God-given breastmilk!" Wow. I am not a confrontational person at all, but what an ignorant statement!! Shame on you. There are many women, like myself, who had full intentions of breastfeeding our babies but could not produce enough milk to sustain them (or many other unavoidable reasons). I remember being a new mother and going through the exhaustihng process of breastfeeding and realizing my child was starving to death, even with help from drugs etc. I remember waking in the middle of the night and breastfeeding then supplimenting my children with formula, them trying to pump to increase my milk flow. The whole process took 2 1/2 hours and my children ate every three. Killing myself with exhaustion (1/2 sleep is not enough for anyone), crying constantly because people like you made me feel inadequate as a woman and a mother and inability to nourish my child, until one day my milk completely stopped. I felt like a failure as a woman and mother and it made what should have been very exciting times in my life, probably the worst. Before you judge people so ignorantly, perhaps you should be grateful for what you have been blessed with and understand that most mothers are doing their absolute best for their children and sometimes there are reasons they are doing what they do. I feel amazing about the choices I have made about the nourishment of my children and formula fed or not, they are intelligent, healthy, thriving people and I will gladly tell anyone that needs to hear it that there is no harm in doing what you need to do.

alyson said...

10:13 AM
on Jan 26, 2012

Report Abuse

I think we all need to get off each others backs. Breast feeding, bottle feeding, why are we judging each other? We are doing the best we can as mothers and instead of vilifying we should be supporting. That being said if you breast feed and choose to do it in public fine, but know some people will judge you. It comes with the territory, but let them it's a free country. If you choose to do it in private fine. Enjoy your peace and quiet. I have breastfed in public but covered up, mostly out of courtesy for other people. I have breastfed in public and not covered up because I was just learning and it was awkward. I have breastfed in private because I was tired and wanted to be alone and I have bottle fed, because with my second son to supplement because my milk didn't have enough fat for him to gain weight. My point is we never know what people are going through and each situation calls for different tactics. We are all doing our best.

mamatomany said...

12:01 PM
on Jan 26, 2012

Report Abuse

Lyno, I'm sorry. That's a very difficult situation to go through. I'm proud of you for trying everything to breastfeed, but bottle-feeding is sometimes the best option. And you are so not a failure as a woman!! Adopted children, especially if they are several months old, may need to be bottle fed, too. As Alyson said, we are all doing our best and that work differently for each person.

azldsgal said...

08:50 AM
on Jan 28, 2012

Report Abuse

I feel you should Never breastfeed in public. There is always a place you can go from private rooms to restrooms. I know everyone says breastfeeding is natural but I am 42 years old and my husband and I don't have kids and never will so breastfeeding in front of us is very offensive. Going to the bathroom is natural but you wouldn't want me doing it right in front of you.

nancy5045 said...

07:37 PM
on Jan 28, 2012

Report Abuse

If you feel uncomfortable....and feel it's justified....got private....but if in a tight place and the child must nurse....do it covered .....they have so many things to help you now.....most people understand and the others will get use to it? Enjoy those babies! Keep them comfortable:)

sophiecat76 said...

12:23 AM
on Jan 31, 2012

Report Abuse

I am definitely Pro-Breastfeeding, I breastfed all my children, including our adopted daughter! There is, however, a time and a place for everything. The male gender, whether we know it or understand it, tend to have sexual feelings when they see a women's breast-- most the time it is an involuntary reaction. So, women, why don't we just help them out by using a cover!? There are some great Breastfeeding covers out there that you can put over your neck so your baby doesn't pull it off. I say, breasfeed with a cover wherever you want--within reason. Sacrament Meeting? Most parents are trying to keep their children quiet during Sacrament Meeting, knowing how noisy my kids were while Breastfeeding, I voluntarily went into the Mother's Room so we could Both relax while my baby (s) fed. The point of being members of a Ward Family, is to help each other out, why not help others listen in Sacrament Meeting by bringing noisy/distractive children outside the Chapel? Bottom line...cover up and Feed!

righteous1 said...

01:55 PM
on Jan 31, 2012

Report Abuse

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q7NrfhWPL1I

novamom said...

11:48 AM
on Feb 09, 2012

Report Abuse

When I was 9 my piano teacher nursed her baby during my lessons. It was so uncomfortable for me and left me with such a distaste for nursing!!! Needless to say I switched teachers shortly thereafter.

westiswife said...

02:35 PM
on Jun 29, 2012

Report Abuse

I think azldsgal said it best "Going to the bathroom is natural but you wouldn't want me doing it right in front of you." I have two girls, and now prego with my third. I pumped for my second for about 2 months, and will probably try to pump for maybe 3 months with this one. Breastfeeding completely disgusts me to the core. I absolutely will not be suckled off of. However I understand the nutritional value to the child and if some women are comfortable with the suckling good for them. But others should not have to witness it.

shastaty said...

04:27 PM
on Jul 29, 2012

Report Abuse

honestly, moms need to deal with their babies the best way they know how and butt out of business of others feeding their babies. I breastfed my first until 19 months, and am 3 months in on my second. WIth my first I would always get up and go to the mothers lounge, where I missed half of church each week and sometimes the sacrament. It's dark, smells like dirty diapers, and there's only two chairs so sometimes I'd have to nurse standing up. I nursed lots more in public usually with a cover when I could, or in a discreet corner but it never ceases to amaze me how people outside the church are far less judgmental than those who are supposedly our brothers and sisters! I now nurse in a sling IN sacrament meeting. For heaven sakes if the men suddenly get inappropriate thoughts instigated by a women covered up nursing their hungry baby, THEY need to learn to control their thoughts. I asked my husband what he thought just now and said "wow, that's utterly ridiculous. Anybody who would have impure thoughts over a nursing mom has some serious issues". Yup, serious issues indeed. And for goodness sake, the way some of our young women dress, I'd think they're looking at more then the nursing moms. In fact, I find it hilarious that several times I've had moms give me the stink eye over nursing my baby...the same moms whose daughters come to church in tight clothing and short skirts. Hmmmm...double standard much ya think? And those saying cover it...fine if you can...and they have covers that go over your neck...but try getting a little one to not pull that up! We have weather over a hundred degrees regularly here and you telling me to cover my babies face when she eats is ridiculous as well. Should a bottlefed baby be required to have his face covered? Would YOUR baby eat with a cover over his head in over a hundred degree weather? Think not. Still, I nurse in sacrament meeting in a sling so I'm covered and hardly anyone notices. I'm tired of missing any much needed spiritual nourishment from sacrament meeting because of the judgmental few who are convinced that it's DIRTY to nurse a baby. Maybe if more moms nursed their babies, more of our kids would grow up realizing that breasts are for what they were intended for. And when our young men go and serve missions in countries where openly breastfeeding is the norm they wouldn't freak out. I read a story of an american mom who was visiting a ward in italy and she tried to cover her nursing baby. The moms there couldn't believe it and were convinced she would suffocate her child. It's cultural people....it's not doctrinal. In fact I have read that the church endorses breastfeeding where possible. So...I don't tell you to put a blanket over your babies head so you can feed him, or go stand in a corner that smells...and you don't tell me I have to do that and we're all good :-) Everybody needs to focus on what we're there for (worshipping and feeling the spirit and get out of thinking about the nursing moms!)
Leave a Comment
Login to leave a comment.
FHE Promo
FEATURED SPONSOR Utah Pioneer at West Jordan Ad 2

Top Stories

  1. What LDS General Authorities Say About Their Wives
  2. Ultimate Guide: Modest Swimwear 2013
  3. Photo Gallery: Women Who Have Mothered Us
  4. Nine Things You Shouldn’t Say to a Depressed Loved One (And What to Say Instead)
  5. Nine Lessons for FHE on "The Family: A Proclamation to the World"
  6. The Perfect Family Reunion Menu
  7. SPONSORED: J. Reuben Clark International Academy Opens New Homeschooling Program
  8. Family Reunions 101
  9. SPONSORED: How to Save Money on Your Electric Bill
  10. WEEK EIGHT: Nine Lessons for FHE on "The Family: A Proclamation to the World"
FEATURED SPONSOR Cruise Lady
FEATURED SPONSOR Fat Boy Ice Cream

Most Popular

  1. LDS missionary dies in Provo following aneurysm
    source: deseretnews.com
  2. NBA Hall-of-Famer Karl Malone meets Mormon missionaries
    source: deseretnews.com
  3. Here's what the new Meridian, Id. LDS temple will look like
    source: ktvb.com
  4. Frances J. Monson, wife of Pres. Thomas S. Monson, passes away
    source: Newsroom.lds.org
  5. LDS woman honored as National Mother of the Year
    source: news.lds.org
  6. LDS missionary in Texas recovering after being hit by vehicle
    source: deseretnews.com
  7. Funeral services for Frances J. Monson announced
    source: Newsroom.lds.org

Helpful Links

LDS.org Deseret Book Time Out for Women LDS Tours and Cruises Family Preparedness Financial Help Missionary Clothing LDS Gifts Nauvoo Hotels

Stay Connected

FREE E-mail Newsletter LDS Living on Facebook Mormon Report on Facebook LDS Living on Twitter Mormon Report on Twitter LDS Living on YouTube LDS Living E-mail Archives
Self Health Marriage & Relationships Self Improvement Family Activities Parenting Pets Tips Home Finances Around the House Preparedness Tips Entertaining Recipes Cooking Techniques
Event Planning Holidays Weddings Tips Travel U.S. International Themed Travel Travel Tips Adventures in Travel Our World People LDS Life Global View Hot Topics Lesson Helps FHE
Sunday School Young Men Young Women Relief Society/Priesthood Primary Visiting Teaching Home Teaching Blogs LDS Living Blog The Food Dish How-to Lifestyle Arts & Entertainment Single Saints Polls Mormon Report
Home Advertise About Us Contact Us Privacy Policy Subscribe ©2013 LDS Living, A Division of Deseret Book Company.